Why I Begrudgingly Call Anne Hathaway My Hero

anne

I’d like to tackle a truly polarizing topic: Anne Hathaway.

It’s very rare to come across a fairly cultured, in-the-know kind of person who actually likes her, and I include myself in that group.  If you’ve paid attention to her, her interviews, or her speeches over the last few years, you’ve probably noticed the following:

  1. She’s pretentious.
  2. She takes herself very seriously.
  3. She probably uses words like “brave” to describe acting.
"I was in the movie, too... you guys?"

“I was in the movie, too… you guys?”

In 2006, she was on Oprah, along with her Brokeback Mountain co-stars, Heath Ledger, Michelle Williams and Jake Gyllenhaal.  During that interview, something struck me:  The other three were obviously very close-knit (and by “obviously,” I mean two of them had a baby together and the other one was named godfather).  Anne was the outsider– she wasn’t dark or deep or layered enough to fit in with their clique.  She probably watched Ugly Betty alone in her trailer with a pile of Jelly Bellies, while Heath, Michelle and Jake smoked and drank and talked about Jack Kerouac while playing Russian Roulette with a rusty knife for the duration of the shoot.  During that hour of daytime television, they weren’t mean to her, they didn’t ignore, her, but her whole being screamed, “Hey, what about me, guys?”

I can’t tell you how much that feeling resonates with me.  My grade school self, my high school self, my college self, my career self.

So what about her, guys?  A few years later, she’s on top of her career.  She’s alive.  She’s happily married.  She is a Golden Globe winner.  She will most likely be an Oscar winner in a few short weeks– all for a part that let her theatre geek nerd light shine, unapologetically (in a film that Beef would like to point out only got a 63 on metacritic).

She cut off her Princess Diaries hair.  She literally starved herself on lettuce leaves to look like she was dying.  She worked really, really hard, the way she wanted to– and it’s paying off for her.  She’s super happy and super proud of herself.  And she super should be.

And yet, if you Google “Anne Hathaway Annoying,” your computer will crash with a bajillion hits.  She’s still nobody’s darling.  I mean, “Thank you for this lovely blunt object that I will forever more use as a weapon against self-doubt”???  COME ON!  Nerd alert!   In fact, it is the very fact that I find Anne rather abrasive and self-important that I respect her so much.  F those Brokeback Mountain cool kids.  She did it on her terms and did what made her happy and didn’t care what anybody else said or did.

And that, my friends, is kinda brave.

anne-hathaway-les-miserables-golden-globes-workplace-ecards-someecards

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At Least They Used a Hyphen

Back around Oscar time, I ran down the list of nominated films through the eyes of a mom who didn’t get out much. Now that some time has passed, I still don’t get out much– but I have been to the movies four (4) times. I am now going to rank the films for you in a segment I think I’ll call Liz’s Movie Reviews. I think it has a nice ring.

Worst to best.

4) The Five-Year Engagement

Jason Segel and Emily Blunt are engaged for five years. Mindy Kaling plays Kelly from The Office and Chris Pratt plays Andy from Parks and Rec and Allison Brie plays the part Anne Hathaway’s too big for now, since she’s kinda moved on from the sidekick roles.  I braved a potentially lethal hail storm to see this movie and I half expected to fall asleep during it, which I did not, but the nap would have been nice. All in all, I’d have to go with Peter Griffin’s assessment of The Godfather and say it insists upon itself. The jokes weren’t funny and the situations seemed forced, BUT I got to leave the house. Bonus point to them for punctuating the title correctly, though, unlike another film that shall remain nameless, but not link-less.

3) The Hunger Games:

I don’t have much to add that hasn’t been said.

2) The Muppets

This is why I saw The Five Year Engagement, and I played right into Jason Segel and Nick Stoller’s hands. This movie was delightful, and after reading all the press surrounding its release, I felt like Jason Segel was my friend from high school who finally made his dream come true… and I was happy for him. No, I was proud of him. And I don’t even know him. Now I’m sort of at that place where I might tell people he was a nice guy in the beginning, but now… he’s changed. But I won’t let it take away my memories. Of muppets.

1) 21 Jump Street

For real. This was one of the best movies I’ve seen in a while. Get the joke? I don’t get out much. But really, it was super funny and delightful and I am so glad it came out after I made up with Jonah Hill. (I really, really didn’t like him– and then I saw Oprah interview him, and  it was like I was blind and now I could see. I could see Jonah Hill, and his spirit was pure and white like a baby dove.) Honestly.

If you liked The Five-Year Engagement, please tell me what I’m missing. I’m curious.

Oscar-Worthy Cats

CAT STARS THAT GIVE UGGIE A RUN FOR HIS MONEY

Uggie may be the breakout star of The Artist, but some of us are just good ole fashioned cat people. If you lie awake at night wondering aren’t there any cat movie stars I can tip my chapeau to this Oscar season?  The answer is yes, there are!

1. Orangey

This talented tabby made his debut as the title role in the 1951 film Rhubarb, but Orangey is is most famous for playing Audrey Hepburn’s cat– Cat–  in Breakfast at Tiffany’s. What’s that? Did he win any awards, you ask? Yes! He’s the only cat to ever win two Patsy Awards, which were the old-timey Oscars for animal actors, making him the Tom Hanks of tomcats.

2. Ted Nude-Gent

Ted’s portrayal of Mr. Bigglesworth in Austin Powers earned this hairless Sphynx the second-most coveted title after People’s Sexiest Man Alive: Cats Magazine named him Cat of the Year in 1999. If only Ryan Gosling had whiskers– maybe he’d have a shot.

3. Bailey & Misha

The Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen of cat actors, these two Himalayans shared the part of Mr. Jinx in Meet the Parents opposite DE NIRO.  Misha performed his own toilet-flushing stunts.

4. Syn

Syn cuts his chops in 1963‘s The Incredible Journey, but it was his ballsy portrayal of “Darn Cat” in That Darn Cat that led The New York Times to declare this Seal Point Siamese the Clark Gable* of felines. (*That  equates to George Clooney in 2012’s celebrity market)