Momfriends and A Grand Jimmy John’s Adventure

I recently read this good old fashioned debate about whether or not there is an underlying hostility between mom and non-moms when it comes to making and maintaining friendships. Since I recently switched from one team to the other, I thought I’d weigh in. There is no denying that friendships change after a baby– and relationships basically break down into three categories:

Old Friends Who Get More Distant: It’s sad but true. Almost overnight, the girls who you would jet off to Vegas with for the weekend continue to jet off, but without you. It’s a little heartbreaking to realize that you’ve become less of a go-to for fun times, especially because free time becomes so much more precious and needed. The thing that makes it easier is to realize that instead of feeling dumped, you have to trust that the Circle of Life is constantly changing, and one day your old pal will have a Simba of her own and you’ll be back in the saddle together again instead of just the occasional dinner.

Old Friends Who Become Closer: It might seem pretty obvious that your friends with kids suddenly move up closer to the top of your rotation. What’s surprising is that you find out which ones of your no-parent friends are baby-obsessed and start calling more often. And come bearing boxes from Baby Gap.

New Friends: True, just because you both have kids doesn’t mean you’ll be besties. But at a time when convenience is crucial, there is nothing wrong with giving someone a shot. Every time I take Posey out for a walk, I fully admit that I check out everyone I see pushing a stroller to see if I might want to strike up a conversation. And I did just meet two other stay-at-homies who literally met on the street, so it happens. But it’s not just about findinging new mom friends. I recently befriended a 27-year-old single former Luvabull who was the LAST person I thought I’d hit it off with. But I think what happened is that since she didn’t know me PP (pre-Posey), in her eyes, I haven’t changed. I’m just the 33-year-old she wound up trespassing onto restricted federal airspace with while on a hunt for Jimmy John’s who happens to be a mom. And in that moment, me having a baby didn’t affect that fact that we needed a police escort out.

So…Fellow Moms– Agree or disagree? Have your friendships changed?

Advertisements

Cleansing Thoughts.

On the first morning of my Retirement four months ago, I laid in bed, drank coffee, and awaited the arrival of my cleaning lady.

I didn’t have a kid. I wasn’t THAT pregnant. And I surely had nothing else to do that day besides maybe go out to lunch. Why on earth couldn’t I clean my own home?            Answer: I didn’t want to.

Anna came today, as she does every other Monday. At this point, I don’t know if it’s the mildew-free shower or the company I look forward to most.

No streaks!

What life luxury can’t you let go of?

Liz Lemon, I presume.

Over the last week, I decided to do something completely unlike me. So I took a short-term job working at lululemon‘s first U.S. warehouse sale. And by “took a job,” I don’t mean signed on as a PR consultant or advised them on their media strategy. I straight up unpacked boxes and worked the cash registers. I made chit chat with guests.  I asked them if they found everything ok. I used their first names after I saw their credit cards. I made eye contact. Sort of. It was good, honest, on-your-feet work, and I liked it. Until I saw people I knew from high school.

I used to have an Important Career. Four months ago, I gave it up. There is a part of me that isn’t ready to accept that I am now a stay-at-homer.  Or a warehouse-sale-in-a-convention-center girl. Was I embarrassed to be spotted there? Not really, because it was a cool event. But what if the people who saw me thought, “That’s all she’s up to?” Would I care?

Would you?